Where Have I Been?

sleeping...
playing...
balding...
mocking...
goofing...
celebrating...

strategizing...
fighting...

Living life.

...and apparently wearing the same shirt the whole time.

Huh!

???????????????

"Name That Dead Thing" Givaway!!

Aparently Mamaholstein gave her gift away to linds from the Daily Knack. So email me what you want as your prize Linds... jrock@live.com

Here is the proof - Mamaholstein is crazy I guess!

Hey Jason,

Woo Hoo!!! I won!! My son is into all kinds of animals so that is how I got the pronghorn. My son rocks!!!

I was just playing for fun so as far as the prize goes I think you should let Linds have pick of my winnings. I think I remember her commenting that she'd like a pair of the earrings or something like that. I don't know her or any of you so it might be weird but that's how I am. Weird. :)

Thanks for the fun!! I love your blog and Erin's too!!

Mamaholstein

Monday Mail!!

SORRY I HAVE BEEN A SLACKER ON THE MONDAY MAIL!! HERE YOU GO!

OOOH!! I will never complain about my kids AGAIN!!!

I swear I saw him (or her) in the Circus when I was a kid! Spammons right, Clowns are freaking scary!



Tell me again where I sign up for this club!




I think he wants to make it look like he is a mother of 12 and 85 years old.

What amazing things they can do with plastic surgery these days, wait....here is another....

COOL! You can even get spikes. (wonder if they are drilled into his skull)

Dude! Check this out the new beer bong through the nose...Yea! THAT'S RIGHT-I AM THE MAN. READ THE STOMACH!

I wounder what it would feel like if this guy got in a water skiing accident. OUCH!

Check my lip out, Angelina Jolie eat your heart out.

I bet he has a shoe lace for every color shirt...I mean you have to match with a style like this!

Turn your flash of when you take a picture of this guy! BLING BLING!! You ain't got notin on this $50,000 mouth!!

This will definitely help my snoring problem!

I keep trying to talk Erin into this one. I thinks it would help anyone go up a notch on the sexy scale!

A drink holder. Why didn't I think of that?

DUDE! Watch me spit loogies through the hole. Just call me "Bull".

Lets hope the one on the right isn't the mentor for the one on the left!

AND THE GRAND FINALLY...

I was going to join in, but there was too many people in line and there wasn't an extra hook for me. DANG!

THE WINNER!!

Congratulations to Mammaholtein in naming the most dead things. She successfully named 4 out of 6.(I don't know how you got pronghorn antelope)

Everyone go and visit and congratulate Mamaholstein!!

Final Dead Thing - Clue!!

Here is a clue...

The contest will end on Weds 30th at midnight. Good Luck!

FINAL in "Name That Dead Thing"

Here is the answer to #5

Its a RACOON!!




I am only listing those who have a chance, so here are the standings:

• erin 6/6 - disqulified!!
• spammon 3/6
• mamaholstein 3/6
• linds 2/6

Here is DEAD THING NUMBER 6 - be specific!!

Late...er Monday Mail

I have been pretty busy at work lately with my new position and trying to MAKE the transition!!! Here is my Monday Mail.

I think my wife would want me to get one of these! I may also add that I am not admitting that I have a problem.

"Dead Thing #5"

Here is Dead Thing #4:

ITS A PHEASANT!!

Here are the standings:

• mamaholstein - 3/6
  
• linds - 2/6
  
• spammon - 2/6
  
• kellyo75 - 1/6
  
• denise - 1/6
  
• bfun1 - 0/6
  
• mom - 0/6
  
• jen - 0/6
  
• shauna - 0/6
  
• ellen - 0/6
  
• christie - 0/6
  

You all need to keep your eye on the PRIZE!!

Two left so her is Dead Thing #5 - Good Luck

Name That Dead Thing #4

Here is the answer to Dead Thing #3

CONGRATS for those who guessed Mountain Lion or Cougar!!

Here are the Standings:

• mamaholstein - 2/6
• linds - 1/6
• kellyo75 - 1/6
• spammon - 1/6
• denise - 1/6
• bfun1 - 0/6
• mom - 0/6
• jen - 0/6
• shauna - 0/6
• ellen - 0/6
• christie - 0/6

HERE IS DEAD THING #4

Good Luck!!

Monday Mail

Master Card Wedding!!

You got to love this guy...

This is a true story about a recent wedding that took place at Clemson University. It was in the local newspaper and even Jay Leno mentioned it. It was a huge wedding with about 300 guests.











After the wedding, at the reception, the groom got up on stage with a microphone to talk to the crowd.

He said he wanted to thank everyone for coming, many from long distances, to support them at their wedding.

He especially wanted to thank the bride's and his family and to thank his new father-in-law for providing such a lavish reception. As a token of his deep appreciation he said he wanted to give everyone a special gift just from him. So taped to the bottom of every one's chair, including the wedding party was an envelope. He said this was his gift to everyone, and asked them to open their envelope.








Inside each manila envelope was an 8x10 glossy of his bride having sex with the best man! The groom had gotten suspicious of them weeks earlier and had hired a private detective to tail them for a couple of minutes, he turned to the best man and said, 'F---you!' Then he turned to his bride and said, 'F--- you! 'Then he turned to the dumbfounded crowd and said, 'I'm outta here.

'He had the marriage annulled first thing in the morning. While most people would have canceled the wedding immediately after finding out about the affair, this guy goes through with the charade, as if nothing were wrong.


His revenge--making the bride's parents pay over $32,000 for a 300-guest wedding and reception, and best of all, trashing the bride's and best man's reputations in front of 300 friends and family members.

This guy has balls the size of church bells!
Do you think we might get a MasterCard 'priceless' commercial out of this?


Elegant wedding reception for 300 family members and friends:
$32,000.
Wedding photographs commemorating the Occasion:
$3,000.
Deluxe two-week honeymoon accommodations in Maui :
$8,500.
The look on every one's face when they see the 8x10 glossy of the bride humping the best man:
Priceless.
There are some things money can't buy, for everything else there's MASTERCARD






A MasterCard Wedding
'Life isn't like a bowl of cherries or peaches, it's more like a jar of Jalapenos--what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow......'

Monday Mail

Here is my Monday Mail. Have a great Monday!

Check out this VIDEO!

Dead Thing #3

Here is the answer to #2!!

Its a bear peeing on a Fire Hydrant!!

Here are the standings :

• erin - 2/6 - Disqualified
• mamaholstein - 1/6
• kellyo75 - 1/6
• bfun1 - 0/6
• linds - 0/6
• spammon - 0/6
• mom - 0/6
• jen - 0/6
• denise - 0/6
• shauna - 0/6
• ellen - 0/6
• christie - 0/6

Here is Dead Thing #3

Second Clue on Dead Thing #2

Nobody guessed right. Well, except Erin because she is freaking awesome! (and had seen all the stuff before but whatever...)



Here is another clue. See if you can guess what it is:

Good Luck!

Monday Mail!

POOR CONFUSED MOOSE!!

Is this what you call STATUEtory RAPE ?? I THINK SO!!

"Name That Dead Thing" #2

Nobody guessed the first one right (maybe I will have to make the next one easier!) You all need to study up on your roadkill and visit Cabella's more often. Here are the standings on the game for all who voted:

Linds : 0/6

Spammon : 0/6

Denise : 0/6

Jen : 0/6

Shauna : 0/6

Ellen : 0/6

Erin : 1/6 - Erin is disqualified only for the fact that she has been here 500 times and knows all the animals here and the kids always demand a tour because there are certain ones they always want to pet!

This is sad!

Here is the answer (be prepared to slap yourself across the face)-

IT'S A BEAVER!!!

Here is Dead Thing #2 -

"Name That Dead Thing" Clue anyone?

Everyone is not even close to the correct answer so here is a clue. Remember only one guess and those who have guessed can have another chance with the second picture!



To see the rules click here!

Monday Mail

This is more amazing than funny,


This is my Monday mail.


Have a good Monday!

CAN YOU: "NAME THAT DEAD THING!"

Yes people! I am attempting my first giveaway here on The Wickedy Wack. There will be prizes at the end so tell your friends and family because everyone can play. Here are the rules!

1. The game will start exactly NOW!! It will continue for six weeks!

2. My boss here at work loves the art of taxidermy and has several trophies on the walls here at my place of work. It will be somewhat the same type of game Lindsey at the Daily Knack did at Christmas time and gave away that sweet scarf that now belongs to Erin. Only this time it is with dead stuff on walls. I will post a small picture of the dead thing and you have a week to guess what it is or until the next dead thing is posted. I will post the next dead item between Thurs and Sat (it will keep you guessing).

3. I will tally and keep track of all the guesses that you have right. You can only guess once so take your time -you have a week. I am going to try and make it tricky!! HA HA!

4. There will be prizes and I have gathered some sponsors who will be donating items as prizes. If you win you will be able to chose one of the following prizes.

Prize #1

This game is sponsored by none other than "Mom #1" and her company "Peacock Chic"! The top winner can choose one of the following prizes. I was going to apologise to the men for not having any manly prizes but I am not going to so gut up, if you don't have a wife or significant other then you have a mother. Everyone has someone to play for! (Peacock Chic makes all their jewelry with fine gemstones and real crystal and silver - est. retail value: $20 per pair)

Prize #2

It is also sponsored by TAGYOUAREIT on Etsy! Hand crafted by Erin and made with love. You can choose anything on the site up to $15 or Erin can customize one with the colors that you like with a matching burp rag. (again to the men "GET OVER IT"! I may do this again so if you know someone who would like to sponsor the next "Name That Dead Thing" game they are welcome to with some manly gifts. Like a rambo knife or cabellas gift card. For now we would like to thank Peacock Chic and TagYouAreIt for sponsoring this one. Thanks

Here is Dead Thing #1....GO!